How to Stop Blaming Yourself and Start Utilizing Your Unique Strengths

Self-blame is a common response when we face difficulties in our lives. Whether it’s a failed relationship, a lost job, or a personal failure, it’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking that it’s all our fault and this negative self-talk can be damaging to our mental health while compounding our problems. 

It’s important to know that it doesn't have to be that way because we all have unique qualities and strengths that we can utilize to solve the problems that once seemed insurmountable. In this blog post, we’ll explore why it’s time to stop blaming yourself and start using your SELF as the tool to create positive and lasting change.

The Damaging Cycle of Self-Blame: Understanding the Negative Impact on Your Mental Health

Self-blame can be a vicious cycle, leading to decreased self-esteem, decreased motivation, and difficulty finding solutions to problems. According to a study conducted by the American Psychological Association, nearly half of all respondents reported feeling responsible for things that were beyond their control. This can lead to feelings of helplessness and a lack of confidence in one’s abilities, creating further evidence that can be used against yourself over and over. I'm an example of this effect. I was a student who constantly blamed myself for poor grades instead of understanding why I struggled to learn. I felt discouraged and unmotivated, which only lead to a down turn in my academic performance which fueled the vicious cycle of unnecessary suffering and compounded the problem. I operated from a saboteur narrative for many years that screamed "YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG" that unquestioned narrative led to personal and professional problems.

From Awareness to Intentional Actions: A Guide to Utilizing Your SELF as the solution

Awareness is the first step in utilizing your SELF as a solution. Take time to understand how you are feeling, your thoughts and beliefs creating that feeling and whether you like the results you are creating for yourself. Questioning your thoughts can play a critical role in overcoming difficulties and forging intentional results. According to a study by the University of Pennsylvania, individuals who engage in positive self-talk show increased levels of motivation and improved self-esteem, leading towards positive change. 

I have clients who struggle with public speaking and have become good at coaching themselves to notice the nerves, and question their thinking that is responsible for the nerves. Being reminded of the objective to deliver information that they are knowledgeable and passionate about will eliminate the negative, saboteur narrative, creating a feeling that drives actions and a completely different public speaking experience.

Harnessing Your Unique Strengths: The Key to Overcoming Obstacles and Becoming the Solution

By utilizing your prodigy brain strengths, you can overcome obstacles and create positive change in your life. According to a study conducted by the National Association of Colleges and Employers, 85% of employers believe that unique strengths are just as important as hard skills when evaluating job candidates. By leveraging our unique strengths, we can find empathy for ourselves and others, and discover new and innovative solutions to problems. This could be as simple as a shy introvert using their natural gift for listening to become an effective mediator and resolve conflicts within a team, or community. Harnessing your strengths starts with the ability to think about your circumstances (being an introvert) differently. 

How To Forge Intentional Results When Faced With Problems

Self-Coaching can be a powerful tool in overcoming difficulties and utilizing your unique strenghts. By talking to yourself in a loving and supportive way, you can increase your motivation, and create Self-Control. This may seem easy but it is a practice that is often overlooked.  According to a study by the University of Liverpool, individuals who engage in positive self-talk are less likely to experience anxiety and stress. Understanding what feelings are driving your actions is the first step to creating sustainable, and intentional results.

The Final Step in Utilizing Your SELF to Create Positive Change

It’s time to stop blaming yourself and start using your unique qualities to create positive change. By understanding the negative effects of self-blame, the benefits of utilizing your unique strengths, practical tips for doing so, and the power of self-coaching, you can empower yourself to solve your problems and achieve your goals. Remember, we all have unique strengths and abilities, and by leveraging these strengths, you can create evidence that utilizing your SELF as a solution is the way to maximum achievement and happiness.

Join our 3 day event, Mind Over Matter where you will learn an operating system that creates SELF control fast. This critical curriculum is long overdue for most people, as formal education systems fail to teach these life skills. The SELF control operating system has unlimited applications and mindblowing effects. Register now to save your seat and recieve the recordings if you can't make it live. This program will be the best $27 investment you'll ever make. Today is the day you stop thinking of yourself as the problem and believe in your SELF as the sustainable solution.